kansas is keeping it real.

oh dear.

so you kansas citians are keeping it real at 5 am,

compliments of ms. whiny pants who keeps claiming the eight.

i don't think it's fair.

i will start a petition.

you can sign it, alright?

let's see here.

what kind of update do i got for you all.

well first off, i had a crazy dream last night.

it was about the end times.

not something that most people want to wake up to.

it's a little frightening.

 

second of all,

last night before i fell asleep all i could think

about was what is would be like

if it all worked out.

i was telling abbie, that i don't want

to go through the let down again.

that would mean i would have to

once again convince myself that vulnerability

was worth it.

and that takes time people.

time i don't have.

so this needs to work out,

for time's sake.

right?

:)

third,

it's a good thing my sister's surgery went well,

and that she isn't sick like last time.

that would be stinky.

thank you to dr. spradlin and team.

we payne and moore folk appreciate it.

oh and i have been reading the bible

a lot recently, and can i just say that once you

get started you just can't stop!

it just creates this thirst in you.

 my mom always told me stories about how in the beginning

when she first became a christian, all she ever wanted to do

was read the bible and quite frankly i didn't understand it,

until i was out of high school. 

then it finally hit me, like a brick wall.

so as long as i am overtaken by love for my savior

all you will be getting are some classic "b jokes" and lectures

about things i am reading.

what a lucky group you are.

so here we go...

ecclesiastes 2:10-11

when i went to jamaica for my senior

missions trip, every single night we had

a time of reflection and bible reading.

someone would speak, usually ted goeke,

a youth pastor and radio dj from georgia.

anyway, one night ted said something that

has stuck with me ever since.

he said:

 "if satan can't make you bad, he will

make you busy."

i think it has stuck with me, because it is so true.

since he can't get me to drink, curse and sex it up, 

he is constantly attempting to distract me from 

what is really important.

and slowly but surely i start doing things that i 

want in my time the way i like it.

it becomes less about god and more about myself.

which leads me to my lecture

from ecclesiastes.

here is what is said in v. 10-11:

"i denied myself nothing my eyes desired;

i refused my heart no pleasure.

my heart took delight in all my work, 

and this was the reward for all my labor. 

yet when i surveyed all that my hands had done,

and what i had toiled to achieve,

everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;

nothing was gained under the sun."

i think i am going to post that up somewhere

to remind me that if my purpose is my own,

then nothing is going to be gained.

it has to be for the lord, or i am going nowhere.

so there you go, 

the lecture for the day is completed.

i hope you enjoyed.

loves. loves. loves. and more loves. 

p.s. 

here is a quote from greys.

good ol' miranda bailey.

"no one is going to be doing surgeries

until i am so happy that i am

mary freakin' poppins!"