oh goodness.

i want to come home.

i want to sleep in my own bed.

i want to eat in my kitchen.

i want to hug my mommy.

i want to drive in the car with my sister and laugh my freaking head off.

i want to snuggle up on the couch and watch lifetime.

i want to have my daddy hold me for a long time.

i want kansas city.

all i can say...

i just want to be there when we're caught in the rain.

i just want to see you laugh and cry.

i just want to feel you, when the night puts on its cloak.

i am lost for words, all i can say is:

i love you till the end.

i love you till the end|the pogues

the song my husband and i will walk down the aisle to.

don't doubt it.

i only speak truth. 

greyhound.

i want to live where soul meets body, and let the sun wrap it's arms around me.

and leave my skin in water cool and cleansing and feel what it's like to believe.

cause in my head there's a greyhound station, where i have set my thoughts to far

off destinations. so they may have a chance of finding a place where they are far 

more suited than here. i cannot guess what we'll discover...

to the greatest....

to the greatest dad and papa, anyone could ever ask for.

we love you.

happy birthday!

to the sweetest...

happy birthday mommy!

i love you.

prayers

pray for a miracle.

i want you to do it today.

pray for something unexpected, inviting and challenging.

see what he sends your way.

you might just be pleasantly surprised.

dream of my life.

dream of my life.

disney world!

you all know how much i love that place,

and although i made it there this summer

it was not exactly the experience of a lifetime.

my left eye was watering and unable to open, 

oh and never mind the fact that  i was 25 lbs heavier.

well good news family,

disney world in honor of 2009 

(and of course moi)

has decided to give everybody

free admission to any park on their

birthday.

mine is less than a month away.

truth.

we choose to marry based on similarities and compatibility, but when the honeymoon's over, we sometimes believe we've made a mistake, not thinking for one moment that God also brings us together for our differences and even our wounds, since living happily ever after is not the only thing He has in mind for us. 

|every heart restored|

if your first concern is to look after yourself, you'll never find yourself. 

but if you forget about yourself and look to me, you'll find both yourself 

and me.

|matthew 10:39|

giving up.

what if we stopped to have a ball

what if the paint chipped from the wall

what if there's always cups in the sink

what if i am not what you think i am

what if i fall further than you

what if you dream of somebody new

what if i never let you win

chase you with a rolling pin

well, what if i do?

cause i am giving up on making passes

and i am giving up on half empty glasses

and i am giving up on greener grasses

i am giving up.

what if our baby comes in after nine

what if your eyes close before mine

what if you lose yourself sometimes

i'll be the one to find you safe in my heart. 

good song.

listen to it.

giving up.

ingrid michaelson.

i had the best day.

i'm thirteen now, and don't know how my friends could be so mean.

i come home crying, and you hold me tight and grab the keys.

and we drive, and drive until we find a town far enough away

and we talk and window shop until i forgot all their names.

i don't know who i am going to talk to now at school,

i know i am laughing on the card ride home with you.

i don't how long it will take for me to feel okay,

but i know i had the best day with you today.

how was i to know,

that my sister was going to be

my very best friend?

now i know why all the trees change in the fall,

i know you were on my side, even when i was wrong.

and i love you for giving me your eyes,

staying back and watching me shine.

and i didn't know if you knew,

so i am taking this chance to say:

i had the best day with you today. 

good news.

i love being back.

i love my friends.

i love my class.

i love room.

i love my roommate.

i love my life.

chi-town is the place to be.

you.

you cause my heart to sing. 

you are always listening.

you understand my dreams. 

you do, you cut away my lies.

you see through my disguise,

you are not so far away from me as i thought you'd be.

you love me as i am, even when i cannot stand.

you whisper in my ear all the things i need to hear, from you.

you are a mystery. 

you bring strong men to their knees.

you change the hearts of kings.

you do, you have names for all your stars.

you heal my wounds and kiss my scars.

you sing a million songs over me.

you|waterdeep

oh me, oh my.

i cannot explain his goodness.

i prayed he would lavish his love on me,

so that i may understand it and he is 

beginning to.

he seriously loves us, despite who we are.

and although i wish that my words and 

experiences would be able to help you

to better understand that, they can't.

it has to be personal, it has to come 

in it's own time. 

but promise me one thing, when it does 

that you will share it with me.

hopefully it will just be one more 

reminder of how great our God is.

a new beginning.

it is time to start this baby up again.

man, i have missed you my dear friends.

sorry for the lack of communication.

i hope this is not falling on deaf ears.

over this next year i will be posting on the all the changes that have both happened and are in the midst of happening.

i hope you enjoy.

loving you.